One of the biggest thing that's stopping people from having what they want in life is FEAR. Fear can paralyze you and make you unhappy because it stops you from doing the things you want to do. That's why it is important to discover what kind of fear you are dealing with and find solutions to get it out of your way.
Here are four different types of fear you may be feeling.
You fear something but you don't know what it is. You have no clear knowledge of the danger you think you may come across. It can also be when you are not clear about the possible effects the danger might have on you. This is the case with what we are currently facing now in the world which is the fear of COVID-19. We are afraid to get it and this virus has caused many people to lose their jobs, therefore, causing them to fear what will happen to them in the future.
You are afraid of not succeeding in the things you want to do or achieve. Fear of failure comes from a series or a pattern of failure like when the people you know have failed in the past or you have experienced a series of failures. This may make you to think or start to believe that you will fail again when you try the next thing or project.
You fear to be successful or achieving your goal. This usually stems from the fact that we have attributed negative stereotypes to money and being successful. For example, many people believe that rich people are heartless, they are unhappy or that money is evil. These beliefs can affect your desire to succeed because you may be afraid of being a bad person when you eventually become rich.
To begin, it is important to find out the root cause or origin of your fear. It could be a series of incidents or one incident. You can talk about it with someone you trust if you feel comfortable or talk about it alone - to yourself. Don't recall the events to correct what happened but think of how those moments have made you a survivor, a stronger person. Think of the lessons learnt and how you did not die because of what happened. Yes. Now you realize that life goes on despite your fears.
In general, it is important to reframe your mind in order to conquer any fears you have. You need to reset your mind to believe that it can overcome that fear and that life goes on despite what you feel.
To do this, you need to visualize yourself facing your fear and then feel the fear and move on from it in your vision.
If you fear to fail, visualize yourself working on a project you are currently doing or intend to do. The project could be public speaking for example. Imagine yourself preparing and delivering your speech. Do the action and live the moment in your mind. Allow yourself to feel the fear and pressure. Also, allow yourself to make all the mistakes that you fear making in your vision. When you are finished delivering your speech in your mind, imagine yourself learning your lessons and moving on.
If you do this exercise often, you will realise that you will come to realise that your reaction to what you fear is more important than what you fear. And that's what gives you control over your fears.
Imagining yourself making all the mistakes and feeling afraid makes your mind realise that it's ok to fail or feel afraid but it's not the end of the world if things go wrong. This will help your mind to stop freaking out when you are faced with your fears.
Here are four different types of fear you may be feeling.
4 Different Types Of Fear & How To Overcome Them By Yourself
Fears and Symptoms
Fear of the Unknown,
You fear something but you don't know what it is. You have no clear knowledge of the danger you think you may come across. It can also be when you are not clear about the possible effects the danger might have on you. This is the case with what we are currently facing now in the world which is the fear of COVID-19. We are afraid to get it and this virus has caused many people to lose their jobs, therefore, causing them to fear what will happen to them in the future.
Fear of Failure,
You are afraid of not succeeding in the things you want to do or achieve. Fear of failure comes from a series or a pattern of failure like when the people you know have failed in the past or you have experienced a series of failures. This may make you to think or start to believe that you will fail again when you try the next thing or project.
Fear of Success,
You fear to be successful or achieving your goal. This usually stems from the fact that we have attributed negative stereotypes to money and being successful. For example, many people believe that rich people are heartless, they are unhappy or that money is evil. These beliefs can affect your desire to succeed because you may be afraid of being a bad person when you eventually become rich.
Fear of What Other People Think
You fear other people's opinions, thoughts and reaction towards you and what you want to do. This is very common with people who don't have enough self-confidence and who tend to value the opinion of others more than their own opinion or feelings. In a situation where the person has always been told what to do or made to do what they don't want to do right from childhood, it may kill self-esteem and make them value more what others think than their personal opinion. Those who feel this fear are more of people pleasers.
These are the common types of fear that people encounter and these are the fears that make most people not to achieve their dreams.
How To Overcome Your Fears.
Overcoming your fears is not an easy thing. It takes lots of courage and some time to do so. But the good news is that it is very possible to overcome your fears. You have all that you need (courage and strength) to do so.
What I want you to understand about fear is that: fear is a defence and protective mechanism put in place by your body to protect you from a danger that it can sense coming. That's why when you feel afraid you want to escape or get away from the danger even without thinking about it thoroughly
This mostly occurs because your mind is aware that what's going to happen isn't good for you. So to stop fear you need to train your mind to believe that something good can come out of this.
This takes time of course but if you do it often you'll be able to minimize your fears.
Find the root cause
To begin, it is important to find out the root cause or origin of your fear. It could be a series of incidents or one incident. You can talk about it with someone you trust if you feel comfortable or talk about it alone - to yourself. Don't recall the events to correct what happened but think of how those moments have made you a survivor, a stronger person. Think of the lessons learnt and how you did not die because of what happened. Yes. Now you realize that life goes on despite your fears.
Visualize
In general, it is important to reframe your mind in order to conquer any fears you have. You need to reset your mind to believe that it can overcome that fear and that life goes on despite what you feel.
To do this, you need to visualize yourself facing your fear and then feel the fear and move on from it in your vision.
If you fear to fail, visualize yourself working on a project you are currently doing or intend to do. The project could be public speaking for example. Imagine yourself preparing and delivering your speech. Do the action and live the moment in your mind. Allow yourself to feel the fear and pressure. Also, allow yourself to make all the mistakes that you fear making in your vision. When you are finished delivering your speech in your mind, imagine yourself learning your lessons and moving on.
If you do this exercise often, you will realise that you will come to realise that your reaction to what you fear is more important than what you fear. And that's what gives you control over your fears.
Imagining yourself making all the mistakes and feeling afraid makes your mind realise that it's ok to fail or feel afraid but it's not the end of the world if things go wrong. This will help your mind to stop freaking out when you are faced with your fears.
Negative experiences have their benefits too. If you train your mind to see that then you will feel less fear. Remind yourself that you'll be ok after the incident even if it is an unknown or uncertain situation.
In addition, face your fears in real life. Don't be hard on yourself and remember that overcoming your fears is a journey which is different for everyone.
I hope you find the strength and patience to overcome whatever fears you may feel right now. It's a difficult time but stay strong. You can do this.
NB: Seek professional help if you can't overcome your fears by yourself. It's ok to seek help.
8 Habits of Love: Overcome Fear and Transform Your Life
Speak With No Fear: Go from a nervous, nauseated, and sweaty speaker to an excited, energized, and passionate presenter
Fear: Understanding and Accepting the Insecurities of Life
The Chemistry of Calm: A Powerful, Drug-Free Plan to Quiet Your Fears and Overcome Your Anxiety
I Will Not Fear: A Strategy to Overcome Anxiety, Worry and Fear-Based Living
Thanks for reading and I'll see you in my next one.
Ngumabi.
NB: Seek professional help if you can't overcome your fears by yourself. It's ok to seek help.
8 Habits of Love: Overcome Fear and Transform Your Life
Speak With No Fear: Go from a nervous, nauseated, and sweaty speaker to an excited, energized, and passionate presenter
Fear: Understanding and Accepting the Insecurities of Life
The Chemistry of Calm: A Powerful, Drug-Free Plan to Quiet Your Fears and Overcome Your Anxiety
I Will Not Fear: A Strategy to Overcome Anxiety, Worry and Fear-Based Living
Thanks for reading and I'll see you in my next one.
Ngumabi.
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